Absurd Movie Sex Scenes

There are plenty of movies out there that can pull off a beautiful love scene. But it takes a skilled filmmaker to make an attractive woman get it on with a talking space duck. All of these movies should make your own weird little sexual preferences seem a little less....illegal.

Ghost Busters

dan Ackroid gets a BJ from a Ghost, and does not call her the next day. Come on dudes, you would do the EXACT same thing if hovering female protoplasm tingled your dingle. Plus, she wouldn't have digits.

Crash (1996)

Automobile accident fetishism at its very finest. Personally, car wrecks are not my thing. I dunno, maybe in the right situation with the right girl? Like a Ford Model and Chevy GTO? Still, probably not.

Teeth

Listen dudes, let's not even talk about this one. Lets talk about something completely different. The Lakers did ok this sea...AHHH HER VAGINA HAS TEETH! This is a horrible concept for a movie, and it's even more horrible that they made it. But they did.

Howard the Duck

He's a duck, but also a lover, and George Lucas made this film. Even watching this as a child I was concerned that it existed. I was also concerned that instead of having the sex talk with me, my parents just showed me the scene pictured above and said "Do you get it? Great!"

The Lawnmower Man

Virtual reality sex is one reason why we should not look forward to the future. I guess that when this movie was made, the idea of doing it over the interweb still had some degree of fascination to it. Now cybersex is as routine as having lunch. Lunch on Craigslist. Lunch on Craigslist three times a day.

A Clockwork Orange

High speed orgies always go better with Beethoven. This might be the only consensual sex in the entire movie. The rest is just ultra violence and time spent at the Milk Bar.

Harold and Maude

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I don't care that this movie is a cult classic, this scene really made me feel bad-funny on my insides. I never saw this movie growing up, and probably for a good reason. My friends were always telling me how phenomenal it was. So I finally gave in. And you know what? It's weird, and that's about it. Who want's to watch a teenager make out with a grandma? Oh yeah, people using the internet.

Eyes Wide shut

Yeah, totally, invite your sister...invite whoever. I can't post a clip of this here, although there are PLENTY on the 'You Tubes.' It has some nipple in it, so they just end up getting taken down. It also has some Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman in it. Those were the days.